A New Day

Two years ago I suffered a loss that came too soon and without warning.  At the age of just 52 my wonderful mother passed on. It was very sudden and a shock to all of us. My father had already passed 8 years prior to that. His passing was also sudden as he was only 48. That’s another blog for another day. In the days that followed my mother’s death my brother and I, with the help of our wives, my mom’s siblings and my grandmother, made the arrangements for her services. I remember being so busy during that time that I didn’t have much time to process what had actually happened. The night before her funeral I remember wishing that tomorrow would not have to come. It wasn’t because I didn’t want to live anymore, I didn’t want to die. I just didn’t want to have to deal with the emotions and grief that would come with the following day. With any death there are always a few days that elapse between someone’s passing and their funeral services but for whatever reason it seems to be the funeral that causes the onset of the realism. It’s the day that makes the passing seem so final. Like anyone in my position I was dreading it. I remember laying in bed thinking that if I didn’t go to sleep, tomorrow wouldn’t come. At somepoint in the early morning my body gave way to the exhaustion brought on by the events of that week and I drifted off to sleep. I remember waking up the next morning to the sound of my 3 month old son crying through the baby monitor. An exhausting sound no doubt but a sign that he was home and safe. I rolled over to see that my 3 year old daughter had climbed into bed with my wife and me at somepoint in the night like she does on occasion.  Lastly, I saw my beautiful wife laying there. She hadn’t left my side since we got the news of my mom. In that moment I knew that I would be ok, that we would all be ok. That day came and went like I knew it would. It was hard, painful and long. The next day came just like the day before. That’s when I  came to the realization that this day couldn’t have came without the previous day. This was a day of healing. A day of learning to live this life without my mother. It was that realization and those emotions that inspired me to make the following quote. “The world doesn’t stop spinning just because your heart is full of sadness. Not because it is unsympathetic but because the most compassionate thing it can do is dawn a new day”.  I miss my mom every day but I’m still thankful for every day that I get. I’m thankful that the sun came up the day of her funeral and every day thereafter.  Each day brings new healing and something to be thankful for.  Don’t take your loved ones for granted. In the wake of heartbreak don’t take a new day for granted.