Month: March 2017

This weekend I am home alone with my two kids. My wife Chelsea, is spending the weekend at the lake with her mom and some of their friends. They try to do this a couple times a year, usually once in the spring and again in the summer. As I sit here thinking about her I’m reminded of the old saying “absence/distance makes the heart grow fonder”. That is one of the reasons that I’m never opposed to her “girls weekends”. But there’s more to it than that. It is my belief that married couples have to take time for themselves and to themselves. We all need time to decompress and get away for our routine every now and then. I also think it is important for individuals to maintain a relationship with who they are inside and who they were before life happened. See, I love my wife and I am in love with my wife and that feeling grows stronger as the years go by. I’m thankful for the life that we have built together and I am more excited every day about what our future holds. But there is one undeniable fact that I think some people overlook. No matter how much I love my wife now she is not the person that I fell in love with. I love Chelsea the wife and Chelsea the mother of two and Chelsea the new career woman but none of those people made me fall in love for the first time. You see, once upon a time there was an “18 year old college student Chelsea”.  She spent many weekends hanging out with her friends and generally doing what 18 year old girls do and enjoying life to the fullest. She was young, energetic, carefree and probably a little reckless.  That is the Chelsea that stopped my life in its tracks. That’s the Chelsea that made me feel something that I’ve never felt before. That’s the Chelsea that put me on the path towards this beautiful life that I now live. Don’t get me wrong I wouldn’t trade my wife now for the 18 year old version of herself that I fell in love with but sometimes I think we lose sight of that. We forget who we were when we fell in love and I think, on occasion, we need to be that person not just for our spouses but for ourselves. Something about you, many years ago, made your spouse stop and tell themselves that you were the one that they wanted to spend the rest of their life with. Do the both of you a favor and keep that person alive, inside of you, forever! I love you baby and I hope you girls or having a blast.

​I get told fairly often that I am wise beyond my years. I would like to think that I am and I appreciate the compliments when I get them. Wisdom is defined as the quality of having experience, knowledge, and good judgment. I believe most would agree that the key word there is experience. Wisdom is often described as something that cannot be taught but must be experienced over time. Being wise is almost synonymous with being old.  So that begs the question, how does one become wise beyond their years? In my case I believe it is an overabundance of life experience in a short amount of time. At a young age I was put in a position where I was forced to grow up fast. Sadly that’s not too uncommon these days. I think often young people find themselves in a position that requires them to make decisions that most their age do not. I don’t view that part of my life with content. I am actually, in some ways, appreciative for the things that I have learned because of the experiences that I have had, both good and bad. I’ve also been very fortunate that for most of my adult life I have worked with and around people much older than myself. I’m thankful that I had the wherewithal to actually listen when these people talked. Some were in positions that I hoped to be in someday and others were in a place that I hoped I would never find myself. Either way I listened and took note. To be surrounded by people who are older than you and willing to mentor you or even just chat with you gives you a great advantage in life. Unfortunately I don’t believe most young people take advantage of that. Not only am I thankful that I took the time to listen but I’m even more thankful that they took the time to teach and talk. They say smart people learn from their mistakes but geniuses learn from other people’s mistakes. I know I am far from a genius but I’ve tried to do my best to emulate those that are successful and not take the same path as those who are not. So maybe that’s where my wisdom comes from. Maybe it’s a combination of the two. Either way they have both served me well and I’m very thankful for them.  The best advice I can give is to surround yourself with people who were once where you are at now and ask them what they did right, what they did wrong and what they wish they would have done different. Take that information and run with it!